The Unofficial British Royal Family Pages

Monday 1 March 2004

Courtly Love: An Introduction

I’m afraid I’m not stating anything really profound when I say that there are those among us with a passion, let’s just call it a “courtly love,” for royalty. 

Like its medieval namesake, this courtly love has less to do with an attainable, requited romance and more to do with distant, platonic love, where we do everything for the object of our affection and they do, well, absolutely nothing.  

In reality, I would venture to guess that most people out there have at least a fleeting interest – positive, negative or neutral – in the goings on of the world’s royals. But for those of us who share a deeper interest in royalty, and, in particular, the British royals, something seems to draw us to them. In turn, the British royal family fascinates and frustrates us and, over time, we find ourselves going to great lengths to learn more about them and perhaps even catch a glimpse of them in their orbit. 

Of course, I am no exception, and for reasons I can’t quite explain, my fascination with royalty is deeply ingrained. For all intents and purposes, it seems to have been with me since my youngest days. Some early proof lies in the fact that, as a girl of about six, I, “Queen Victoria,” would sit on my throne (a pink velveteen chair), wrapped in an ermine robe (a fake fur throw rug), bathed in jewels (my grandmother’s paste), and accept homage from my subjects (my sister and our dolls).   

Around the same time, my paternal grandfather, bless his heart, would announce me as I came into a room, proclaiming, “hear ye, hear ye, I present to you her royal highness Princess Victoria,” much to my delight. Of course, he had unknowingly demoted me from my self-proclaimed exalted rank of queen, but this was just a minor detail that had little bearing on the overall effect.   

Perhaps not surprisingly, many years ago I acquired the nickname of “princess,” which I still retain, so I guess my grandfather was right after all. Ironically, through researching my family genealogy, another of my passions, I discovered that I am indeed the descendant of royalty, including William the Conqueror (but, hey, who isn’t?), among others, and am even the 14^th great-granddaughter of King Louis XI of France. For some strange reason, however, I can’t seem to get people to treat me accordingly. But I digress… 

Outside the realm of fantasy and indulgence, I expressed a more grounded interest in all things royal by spending much of my spare time reading about (who else?) Queen Victoria and various other British and European royalty. This was done completely voluntarily at a very young age. I was also deeply curious about some of the more perplexing events of royal history and was constantly asking questions of my elders. For instance, why a king had to give up his throne to be married to the woman he loved and, on a surprisingly intellectual level for a juvenile, was it really just because he loved her?  

When Lady Diana married Prince Charles, I was enormously pleased that people told me I resembled the new Princess of Wales. This, despite being only 7-years-old, was probably due to the fact that I was blonde and fair with big blue eyes and approximately the same feathered haircut as Diana had at the time. To be honest though, I was even more pleased when I was told the same thing at the age of 21 (minus the feathered hair of course). 

As I matured, so did my interest in royalty and, in particular, the British royal family.  Over the years, my knowledge and my personal library have grown to reflect this and I’ve spent many hours researching and writing about various time periods, events, and people. The apex of this occurred a little over two years ago when I decided to give up the typical corporate life and start a life of travel, research and writing related to my passions. What else could combine writing, travel and history and spin them into a fabulous story?  And what better way to teach the past than to put it into a form that makes people want to learn more?  

So, with some planning and preparation, I kicked off my new life in May 2002 by leaving Dallas, Texas, and arriving directly at the Queen’s Golden Jubilee in London. Alone and only moderately familiar with my surroundings, I managed through a very precarious combination of fortune and determination to stand at the very front line of the celebrations, leaning on the barricade to the parade route on The Mall.  To my right, I had a clear view of the massive memorial to Queen Victoria, and behind her, Buckingham Palace itself.  To my left, I watched as parade floats, processions and royals on foot and in carriages marched directly past me.  

For three days, I held my Union Jack flag high in the air, waved at the Queen as she passed by, shook hands with princes and princesses, laughed and joked with my new British friends, and celebrated national pride and unity at this historic event. Later, as the royals went on a walkabout, I met Prince Charles, Prince Harry, Peter Phillips and the Countess of Wessex, and even had a close encounter with Prince Andrew’s armpit and generated interest from Princess Beatrice for my bejeweled American flag pin.  

Overall, It was an incredible experience and served to make me feel as though I had been a real part of an institution of which I am really only a spectator. (There’s that courtly love effect again.) Since then, the British monarchy, past and present, along with my broader interest in history and genealogy, has become less of an avocation and more of a part-time vocation. I’ve built on my years of book knowledge by spending as much time as possible in Britain visiting a multitude of royal locations, museums, libraries and archives… basically anywhere I can expand my knowledge or experience my passion first-hand. 

This is what I hope to share with you each week in this column, from the modern to the historical, the important to the inane, and the factual to the opinionated – all about the British monarchy. I strive not only to write enjoyable, informative and entertaining articles, but also for accuracy in historical fact and modern detail, so I hope that those of you who read this column will share your knowledge when you disagree with my fact-based information, as well as your thoughts on the more opinionated aspects. I’m also happy to research and write about topics that you are interested in and would be happy to consider your requests. 

I’m looking forward to writing for you, hearing from you and sharing our passion together.

- Tori Van Orden

Next week: "A Princess by Any Other Name..."

Postscript:

Although this is officially an introductory column, I couldn’t with good conscience complete it without some little tidbits related entirely to the monarchy. And since this column is entitled “Courtly Love,” what better subject could there be than the true courtly love? So here goes… 

The 12^th century treatise, The Art of Courtly Love, was based on the French court of Eleanor of Aquitaine, then Queen of France, and was written by Andreas Capellanus at the request of Eleanor’s daughter, Marie de France, Countess of Champagne, who felt it was important to carry on the traditions her mother had started. 

It was also intended at the time to be something of a “manual” to the proper way of conducting oneself in love and romance, and included descriptions of love and who is suited for love, sample dialogue of love affairs, and specific rules of love. In many ways, it echoed some of the concepts of Arthurian chivalry, where love was sacred, but not always sexual, and a knight could love and honor his maiden from afar and never soil her honor.  

In courtly love, however, the knight was replaced by the troubadour, who read poetry and sang songs to the object of his affection – at the highest level, the queen – that pronounced his deep and abiding love.  In The Art of Courtly Love, Capellanus also positions the woman as the mistress and the man as the vassal who serves her. From this perspective, it’s easy to see how courtly love was perhaps intended to fill a romantic void among royal women who were forced into loveless marriages, but expected to remain chaste. 

The concept of courtly love was embraced with a passion, soon spreading from France to the courts of England, undoubtedly thanks in part to the fact that Eleanor had divorced the French King Louis VII and “changed sides” to marry England’s King Henry II and become queen of England. 

In fact, it resonated so well with the English, that courtly love became a prevalent theme throughout hundreds of years of English literature. Even Queen Victoria and Prince Albert embraced the ideals of courtly love (along with those of Arthurian chivalry) molding it to fit their preferences and instigating something of a “Victorianized” revival in the 19^th century. 

Unfortunately, it would seem that there is little, if anything, in the modern British monarchy that harkens back to the idea of courtly love. It could be argued, however, that, while the idea has always been there, it has never really been a truism… just a romantic dream among a system where love, traditionally, has played a relatively minor role in the married lives of real monarchs. 

The Art of Courtly Love by Andreas Capellanus is available on Amazon.com.